Tuesday, March 17, 2009
ARRESTED ON HOLI!
ARRESTED ON HOLI!
NOW WHO WANTS UNLIMITED SEX ON HOLI???AND WANTS TO GET ARRESTED WHILE DOING IT!! :)??
Ahaan!! Having grabbed your attention, I come straight to the main reason why this write-up was given birth! Although, I must confess, that the prologue has little to do with the contents that follow...
Many Homo sapiens had come to my knowledge who have been perpetually tagged with misfortune and unforeseen circumstances. They are 24x7 the victims of weird happenings, not initiated by them. Basically, they are slaves to Miss Calamity and ought to be labeled Red, Hot and Dangerous explosives that may go, “Kaboom” Any moment!
Now for all those who are totally nonplussed as to where is this leading, allow me to put your doubts to rest. We are describing, myself, a clumsy species that eternally has trouble tailing her, and seems to become the object of mirth, and hence providing constant entertainment to people, so frequently, that she could qualify as Mr. Bean’s sibling
One of the innumerable hilarious episodes, which at the moment of the mishap seemed far from so, is the Holi havoc. Having lost the entire set of my room keys, I needed to have my bedroom handle lock changed, which was instantly done by a carpenter working in the apartment below. The morning after,”the unholy-Holi morning”, I awaken to the fact that I am not able to open the door as the handle had been set free! Still hung over by lack of sleep and an unfocused mind, with all my might, my will and my determination, I try to yield as much pressure on the handle.
Finally the poor unassuming metal, yanks and snaps from its spring, into a sweaty, clammy palm, blushing with gnawingly painful blisters!!
For a moment I felt the strength of Mike Tyson flowing through my veins, but the euphoria was short-lived! Woes of woes, the 24 hour help lady was on a festive vacation. With both my mobile phones getting charged in the study, my telephone directory being marked absent from the room, a dead wi -fi connection as my laptop had been mercilessly damaged by my inadequacy with the techno gizmos, where did I stand??
Ahh an obsolete non functional landline, lying in a corner of the room. To get it working and alive again, it had to be charged. Eureka!! I remembered dad’s number,
Engaged!! He seemed to be preoccupied, chatting up with uncles his age, and must be making plans to congregate in the colony park to enjoy a leisurely, blissfully colorful Holi!
Fortunately, my room has a window that opens into the back ally, I catch a glimpse of the servant’s kids and some grownups smothering each other with auspicious gulal. “Help!”
I bellow. “I am under house arrest by my own will and not to mention, my foolhardiness. Please take the keys and rescue me!” They gaze at me as though I am pouring Latin, French ad Greek into their benevolent ears. “Fool!”
I mentally reprimand myself, its Hindi that works wonders in such situations.
After having thrown my keys across, I was knocked into the realization, that even if they unlocked the main gate, there was the iron bolt and the wooden door to combat with? Trials Never end.
They say that the penultimate test is always in hot waters [or maybe something like that]
I need such adventurous and audacious situations to get my idle brain functioning. Then the idea struck me like a bolt of lightening, when in trouble dial 100, and indeed that was the brainwave of holy day, I mean the holi –day.
“Police beat room!” Cooed a voice, which sounded music to my ears. Having explained my situation all I had to do was, wait. Taking advantage of the time at hand, I showered and got dressed to play the festive holi with friends.
Although I must add it was not at all tasteful witnessing eight men clothed in police uniform, crackling in a heavy Haryanvi accent, breaking the main door and raiding my entire house. Yet, that moment I could comprehend the significance of the term “freedom”.
With the newly acquired autonomy, I was all set to enjoy it to the hilt, armed with a new confidence, a new life, a new meaning!! Ouch! Okay I know, I know, it’s getting way out of the league
So we come to an end of episode one of the 1st day series. Episode two of the same day to follow soon! All’s well that end’s well. May we all stay blessed!